Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Rejected Tea Bar Flavours

  • finaliTEA: a black tea, with bright citrus flavours and flecks of cyanide tablets
  • dispariTEA: a hand rolled flowering tea, produced cheaply by exploiting 3rd world workers
  • insaniTEA: an intense herbal infusion, with the occasional hallucinogenic mushroom to liven up your afternoon.
  • extremiTEA: a light black tea, with some flesh included, from those workers that put their arms too far into the threshing machine
  • fataliTEA: A fine oolong tea that may cause ejection of the spine. Jonny Cages tea of choice!
  • conductiviTEA: A green tea, accented with metal fillings. Raidens favourite!
  • insecuriTEA: The finest of white teas, you'll never feel adequate in comparison.
  • uncertainTEA: We know exactly what kind of tea this is, unfortunately that means we have no idea where it is.
  • InstabiliTEA: A blend of Assam and ceylon teas, with a dash of neurotoxin for arroma.
  • RoyalTEA: We get 1% of the purchase price of this tea.
  • FrivoliTEA: We'll laugh at you for buying the worst tea we have

Update on the Chess Hammer Crew

Good afternoon viewers of the collective,

How nice you to join us, but we are not coming apart. In fact, here is an update on the going ons and officially announce the birth of a new project.

Today we welcome the newest addition to the Chess Hammer group, The Archive of Mediocre Superheroes.

This is a collection of superheroes that are just not that super, spawned from the depths of sleep deprivation and The Adventures of Broken Thermostat Man; a radio serial under development with production planned to start in December. Meet the heroes before they try to make the world a better place, one mediocre problem at a time. Then maybe, just maybe, society will appreciate their efforts.

The first project is now at the final mixing stage, proving once and for all that there is no such thing as “too niche” when you are on the internet, and hopefully should be coming out around Christmas. Just in time to be not considered for the Hollywood award season.

Rusty is still talking shit at Swinging like a rusty gate on this site here. It was better to leave him in his own corner mumbling to himself. He will now be updating this blog to publicise his activities, more so to check to see if he is breathing still.

To be up to date with all the latest happenings on The Chess Hammer click the button marked “Join this site” and be the first to know. It’s okay, we won’t tell anybody.

Keep punching those camels’ folks,

The Chess Hammer